Showing posts with label Overthinking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Overthinking. Show all posts

Saturday, 16 February 2019

Bring on the daylight!!! We're nearly there! The Smile Coach doesn't hibernate well. Do you?

Hi Smilers! How are you all?

Once again, thank you so much for all your support whether that's, a like, share, comment, chat, advice, or taking those steps to look into become a Smiler......or just continuing to be one....thank you. Without it, The Smile Coach would not be a concept, I've realised that I've been working on this idea for a very long time and look forward to it becoming a fully functioning business, it excites me that I can help people that feel just like I have and at times still do....

So this blog is about just that, I think January is a dark old time, it brings us all down, its a long month, we have to prioritise financially as there are about 100 days in that month, mentally you may want to be out there doing it all but the short days and the weather just don't help your motivation when you're maybe not feeling your best...clothes are a bit tight from all the December fun, chocs, party food and of course the wine/prosecco followed by Christmas Baileys.

It's so right that we should celebrate Christmas, enjoy spending time with family and friends but maybe if we extended that longer into January we could all help each other....and maybe the food wouldn't impact so much as we wouldn't rush to enjoy it all so much over such a short time. We'd all keep the happy hormones going longer and not struggle on so much...sometimes alone. We can be surrounded by so many people yet still feel lonely......and then comes the overthinking. Gotta love the overthinking...if the rest doesn't get you, that will!

So what can we do about it? I realise that I'm writing this in February but it can apply all year round!

1) Talk Talk Talk....let it out, get it out. We can so easily build up the small things into big things by whirling them around in our heads over and over again. If you don't have close family, there's friends and if you don't feel like you have friends (i bet you do...you just may be overthinking it), colleagues, the person that says hi to you on your morning wander....there will be someone that you can offload to.

I have my "go to" people and I hope they consider me the same.Sometimes promoting myself as The Smile Coach complicates my overthinking more but they help me to remember that I am also human...and then I think well without a journey I wouldn't be a great coach!

2) Find some activity that you can do to divert your mind from the darkness. January has bought icy pavements and lots of rain so my sports of choice running and netball have been a bit sporadic. Although my beginners running group has managed to keep going whatever the weather, and we've had it all except sunshine!

I needed to find something else though as I'm used to higher activity levels so I've restarted my Hiit sessions with Joe Wicks The Body Coach. I love his sessions, they are short and sharp, 15 mins every 2 days is what I've been doing.

All his workouts on on his You Tube Channel for free, there is no reason why not. Its time to tone up those wobbly bits, ready for the year ahead and for me it's a big number at the end of the year so I need to enter the next decade feeling positive!

I've also realised that by doing his workouts I've helped myself in another way, I was really struggling to wake up and get up to my alarm/Jack but by getting up half an hour earlier the mornings are much more organised for the school run, book bags etc are sorted if I haven't done them the night before!

I know I'm lucky in the level of activity that I can do and understand that some can't but I can honestly say that there is a pathway for you no matter what you feel you can physically do, it may just be some breathing and relaxation exercises initially but opening up that pathway will do wonders for your mind in the long run.

3) Find a future focus, now this could be absolutely anything that floats your boat, anything that builds fire within your soul and anything that helps you move forward from the madness of January.

My current personal goal is to run Hastings Half Marathon at the end of March, You might think...well she ran a marathon in October that's easy....it's really not. Beachy Head Marathon definitely took it out of me and left me with a slight knee niggle that I've tried to nurture so that it doesn't lead to long term damage yet have still had to put the longer miles in to keep the legs in the game! But the mental motivation I have knowing that I have a day, a date that I need to do what I've set out to do, along with many other mad people is what gets me out there! And you can't beat a chat with a good running friend to clear your head too!

The Smile Coach needed a future goal too, one that is manageable around the rest of life but that will continue to drive my coaching forward after completing my Life Coaching course  I have now signed up to a Diploma in Weight Loss Coaching. I want to go towards Nutrition and this is my first step towards that whilst my monkeys need me around.

So this future goal leads me to letting you all in on some news that if you've been thinking about getting in touch may help you to do it sooner rather than later.....I will need Case Studies for this course so for that reason I am going to reduce the prices that The Smile Coach charges for a limited period so if you've been thinking about finding out more, please get in touch and lets get you smiling!

I plan for a limited period to reduce my regular Smiling sessions from £30.00 to £20.00 per session. The One-off Goal setting sessions will remain the same. If you've been thinking about it for a while, now is the time, it won't last forever, just mention Smile when you contact me :) !

Look Spring is on it's way, a glimpse of battle on a 12.5 mile training run on 09/02/19 


4) Get the Girls round (or boys!) This is my number one recommendation, whether it's just a cuppa or a full on night of fun together, food, fun and bubbles! Sometimes you know you need it, sometimes you don't, but that release of negative energy can be at it's quickest when you get to put the world to rights with the right people, who just let you be you. It may just be 1 friend, it may be a group, it really doesn't matter but the power you gain from just letting it out, or maybe not letting it out but listening to their worries or rants too, can just normalise your thoughts and prioritise how high on the list yours really are!


A Girl's night is always a positive thing with the Awesome Foursome!


Overall Smile Thought: Look to the Future.....It's all ahead of you, now go get it! You're in charge of your own destiny! And if you're not sure how, let me know, I'm sure I can help! It might be health,weight, fitness, career, just plain old surviving the busy everyday life, needing time for you, whatever it is, we can tackle it together!

Wishing you all Big Smiles, look after those that you love!
Have a great month!

Lots of love,

The Smile Coach

www.thesmilecoachforyou.co.uk

Facebook: Emma Wareham
Instagram: @Thesmilecoachforyou
Twitter: @Emmalovesarun




Friday, 26 October 2018

The Smile Coach: Achievement...What can you set your mind to? Part 4

So what could have possibly come next?

I spent the next week recovering from a hard mentally and physically run. Lucky I have some great friends and whether they know it or not they get me through it! Sharon, you are a star!
Follow the Yellow Brick Road! 

So the following Sunday, Sunday just gone, I began another club challenge, delving into the unknown, my understanding was a pleasurable amble of anything from 6 to 26 miles, depending on what you want to do. This one though was a new challenge, I was happy with the fact the Marathon probably wasn't going to happen this year....

What a difference a week can make, beautiful weather! This time the jacket was off by the 2nd stop because it was too hot! 12 miles came and went, got to 18/19 miles....unknown mileage for me...I felt so happy, I'd fuelled right, I was feeling good, if not a little tired, the views of the Southdowns were amazing, having never been up there before, it was breathtaking...and so was the running.

It felt like we ran around the outside of Lewes as the views changed....such long deep hills, the estuaries of Newhaven....beautiful views of Alfriston. This is why I love running...you see so much that you wouldn't normally see otherwise but that can be achieved by going round the block or by going a bit further out to places you've never been, that's why i think I've stuck with running for so long, every run is different, every run is a new achievement. Those hills that I've looked at from the A27, I can now say I've run over them!, I've been up there!


If Only!


Support on the day was fantastic, thank to all who ran with me!

Beautiful Views
I'd had no goals at the start, except to maybe keep my mileage up but by the end of the day I surpassed all of my expectations, I'd gone 5 miles over my previous heights....but I'm also so proud of myself that I stopped when I did. I stopped at 23 miles, I had nothing to prove, my body was tired, I was mentally done, I knew this when we stopped about 19 miles in and my eyes did began to well up, I chose then to stop at the next stop.

And I did! I knew that if this was a marathon, I could push myself to walk that last 3 miles, probably very slowly, but I would do it....but not today.

I was on a high that I'd gone that far, so much of a high that now in a few weeks time, I will be running Beachy Head Marathon on 27/10/2018.

Immediately after 23 miles!
It's so funny how life does it sometimes, It was a goal, then it wasn't, which I was quite happy with.....and then in the space of a few hours it became a goal again! A realistic one, that I know I can do!

As long as you look after yourself and listen to your body, you can do anything that you want to do....you just have to have a starting point and a desire......maybe that's where The Smile Coach can help you out. Goals are goals, whatever size they are we can achieve them together!

Thank you for reading my blog again, Please do give me feedback on the weekly approach.

Any update that I promised, I'll right into next month's blog!

Keep Smiling!!!

The Smile Coach,

Located in Hastings, East Sussex

www.thesmilecoachforyou.co.uk

Facebook: Emma Wareham
Instagram: @thesmilecoachforyou
Twitter: @emmalovesarun

https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/emma-wareham1



Saturday, 20 October 2018

The Smile Coach: Achievement...What can you set your mind to? Part 3

Part 3.....Where did I get to?

Oh yeah, that self doubt was setting in....I also think I'd got to an OK point of thinking, oh well, there's always next year......It's ok, I'm not bothered, I'm ok with this....And I was, I was actually ok with this, because I believe that when the time is right, you will do it, what ever it is!

It might be something you never thought you would do...it might be something you planned but you're not quite ready to...but I'm a great believer in, plant the seed and the tree will grow.... that desire won't go away, but when the time is right you can act on it, thats why I believe there are so many Smiler's out there, whether you've got in touch or not...when the time is right...for you...you will!

It's a bit like giving up smoking, until the point where it is 100% what you want to do, it will not happen. Once it is that 100% you, it will happen!

2 weeks ago on Sunday I got up to go and do the Rye to Hastings Race with my club Hastings Runners, I love this run, well after the first 3 miles or so anyway. The views are usually spectacular, the weather is lovely, and there's lots of people to run with at the back (my favourite place to be, of course).

NOT this year, the weather forecast was horrendous, but ever the optimist, I thought, nah, it'll be ok...up until midnight the night before the lovely Sharon was messaging me and the lovely Arrianne, firstly, are we mad enough to do this and then are you mad enough to do this?? respectively!

I set a time of 6.45 the next morning to decide...I slept really badly, thinking about what was ahead...I woke up many times...then the alarm after 5 hours 45 mins of sleep and decided...yes we are doing it!

What made me decide this... well I thought ahead to the future...to how I wanted to feel and I knew that if I hadn't got on that coach at silly o'clock on a Sunday Morning, I would annoy myself allday, because lunchtime would come and go and I'd think, well I could have done that, the weather's much better now!

So on the coach we got....off the coach we got....sometimes there are advantages to being one of the more......time relaxed members of a club...the weather was so bad, we got an earlier start....yes please, I'd love to run in that rain even earlier....the weather was that bad, I stepped over a dead frog and soapsuds started appearing from nowhere out of my running gear...I thought it was my dextrose tablets disintegrating until, in an effort to prove that it was the Dextrose I got a taste of soap instead, great advert for Aldi though, keeps washing even after the machine!!!


Delirium set in at this point! Singing Queen's Don't stop me now, poor Kim had to listen to it!


There was mud, there was beach stones allowing the faster to pass easier on the world's narrowest running path with only an inch of safety before possibly falling down a hill onto a fast road. There was no possible way of stopping for the yearly selfie stop, everything was far too wet for that. I thought about ditching the running jacket as it was wetter than me...but the gloves in my bag were even wetter so there was no warmth to gain.....pretty much, it was the toughest run I've ever,ever had.12.8 miles of not much fun! But of course I kept that smile as much as I could, because I was doing it, I was out there, I was ALIVE!!!! I was also quite delirious by the end...but I did it...because I can and if I can...anyone can!

Part 4 coming up next week!

The Smile Coach,

Located in Hastings, East Sussex

www.thesmilecoachforyou.co.uk

Facebook: Emma Wareham
Instagram: @thesmilecoachforyou
Twitter: @emmalovesarun

And if you're feeling a little generous.....just a few pennies would be much appreciated...https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/emma-wareham1 




Friday, 12 October 2018

The Smile Coach: Achievement....What can you set your mind to?.....Part 2

Welcome Back Smilers! Thanks for sticking with me for Part 2!

The title for this month is Achievement, but what does that really mean?

For me, I think it is doing more than you ever thought you could do...pushing yourself more, putting yourself out there....moving it forward no matter what you come up against.

I do this, many people I know do this, but it can be measured on so many levels, that's what I love about it. It is as big as you feel it is...and I bet you don't always give yourself the credit that you deserve!

At the beginning of this year I had the idea in my head that I would love to run a marathon, this wasn't a new thought but it was one that felt more realistic than before, if not for this year, for a year very close to this one.

I trained for Hastings Half Marathon early on, as I regularly do, I love this half, the atmosphere is AMAZING! If you are considering it, just sign up, I promise you that it will be worth it!

I train with some fantastic friends, I really do love them all, I think we all help each other out, mainly when we don't realise that it's needed.I improved my time this year, getting closer to a pre-Jack half time. I was so happy, you'd think that I would then continue running distances so that by the time Beachy Head Marathon comes round at the end of October I'd be more than ready......but no!

I have kept up the regular stuff, Netball, my amazing Bin Running Group 5K's, Fitness rave's, anything else that comes up, but generally family weekend life seems to get in the way of the distance runs, (this is by no means a bad thing, as I look to the future, I see my Aimee growing up, I know Jack will only follow, at that point there needs to be some future goals in place,) I managed 1 10K in the summer, but I think it's fair to say that I have not put in the effort that you would think a Marathon would require.

My head has been having some serious debates with itself, even The Smile Coach isn't immune to these demons! I should have done more, I should have known better, I should, I should, I should...there's that perception bit again! It really does creep up everywhere!

On to Part 3.....


The Smile Coach,

Located in Hastings, East Sussex

www.thesmilecoachforyou.co.uk

Facebook: Emma Wareham
Instagram: @thesmilecoachforyou
Twitter: @emmalovesarun

If you can spare a penny or two....https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/emma-wareham1

Monday, 27 August 2018

Blog No 5: Perception- How The Smile Coach discovered the hold it can have over you and your life!

Hey Friends, Readers, Smilers and Future Smilers! (I'd love you to be!)

How are you all doing?

Apologies that this blog is a little later than usual, the busyness of the  Summer Hols have caught up with me I think, trying to keep the balance of fun and new adventures (currently writing this blog whilst in the car taking Aimee to her first festival to see @The_Prodigy! Don't worry I'm not driving!) with a good mix of eyes & teeth MOT's as well as shopping for school uniforms. It's still not sinking in yet that Jack starts school in just a couple of weeks time!

Soggy Family Memories: Awaiting The Prodigy @ The Victorious Festival!


Anyway, what's The Smile Coach been up to in a non Summer Hols way?

Well, in my last blog I told you that I was going to see a consultant about my mystery, possibly, gluten attacks, I thought that he'd tell me that there's not much they can do and send me, probably unhappily, for once, on my way.....but he didn't. Apparently my test results were indicating some issues so I ended up with a swift invite for an Endoscopy and a Colonoscopy. What a treat I was in for!

I'm not going to go into details on here, there are somethings that really don't need to be blogged about, but if you ever get offered the same mind blowing experience, drop me a message and I can try and guide you through the build up to such a "lovely" experience! Now that it's done I'll get full results next month, I'll update you then, if there's anything interesting to report.

During the aftermath of my funfilled day, I have returned to normal life pretty quickly, back to the day job, back to being Emma, back to being mum. The only thing that I did delay was my Smile Coaching as I want to be able to give all of my sessions 100% of The Smile Coach and as the procedures were unknown territory to me I planned coaching the week before giving me the week of "doomsday" to recover and then return to my fortnightly sessions, fully smiling!

That week is this week, I'm looking forward to catching up with all Smilers, seeing what they've been up to and how we can together keep them moving forward.

I'm learning a lot, what I can do, what situations challenge me during coaching, but that push me that bit more to hone and progress my skills. I really do hope that whatever has happened before my Smilers meet me, that they feel they are smiling by the time they leave me and are feeling proud of their progress towards their chosen goals.

I know that nothing happens quickly overnight, but I hope that with my hard work and determination that The Smile Coach becomes a respected place for realistic weight loss coaching, motivation and confidence boosting and that people will know that I'm here to help and to propel them into their future minds, after all, it's all about the mind, get that to it's happy place and the rest happily follows. I'm proof of that and now that I've written this statement, it will come true, I just need to click my ruby red heels three times! He hee!!!

So....this brings me onto to the title of this blog.....Perception.....to me that's a gigantic word!

It is so important to each and everyone of us and one that, once you finally understand it's true meaning, can release you from your own mental health nightmare, don't get me wrong though, the daily struggles may still be there but that dark pull, down that spiral can be avoided easier, we are all very different and what's right for me maybe very different for another but I hope that my perspective on Perception might help someone else to release their mind from their own continuous negative circles of thought.

As I'm growing and becoming more aware of me, of who I am, why I'm here, I feel more and more like I was put here as a connector of people.... as I look back over my life (which I'm hoping is only halfway through) I'm always a link between people, sometimes positive, sometimes negative depending on their own experiences,thoughts, feelings and of course...perspective of situations.

This just feels like my logical outlook on things and I've never minded being that connector, but a couple of years ago, back when life became a bit too much to cope with because of the constant battle of researching help for my gorgeous little man's food intolerance's, I was sinking deeper and deeper into a darkness, trying to keep a lid on things, trying to keep up with daily life, trying to find answers and trying to do it all on no sleep for 18 months, (literally no sleep, Zombie world, Food Intolerance world!).

I constantly felt judged, I felt like no one believed me, I felt the need to do it all, I felt pressure in not being able to fix the problem, I felt like the whole world could see all of this, I felt alone (to any friends and family reading this, physically I wasn't, I know you were there, :) ), I felt financial pressures from not being able to earn enough for everyday life plus for help to find little man's answers......I felt..... I felt...... I felt......can you see the common theme here?

It was all about what I felt and thought, the situations were real but my overthinking was accelerating my own mental health....my perspective, my perception.

I was living it, and inside.... it was getting worse....but in reality I had people around me, friends and family, I was supported, not alone, Team Wareham was and still is a strong unit, and eventually life would settle and we would learn to live with the intolerance's, but at that point I was beyond being able to see or think straight, my perception needed some help!

So what changed?

Quite simply (but hard at the time)......Talking!

Talking changed everything and also knowing some of the kindest hearts around. Releasing some of those repetitive, circular thoughts, realising that friends weren't sick of me going on, that they actually wanted to do anything they could to help, and they did help, they were legendary and it will never be forgotten, and they all know who they are.

One in particular amazing friend set up a whole day of support that changed everything as it gave us the ability to see private practitioners and try alternative methods to help our little man and his complicated digestive system (these will follow in a future blog!) and it still helps us now, we've come so far and I never thought I'd be this calm about the Jack starting school and entering his own world where I don't have full control over his food choices, luckily he is a very clued up small person and manages his own food choices really well!

Once I'd begun to open up, to release my thoughts, I began to see what had always been in front of me, it really was just (not a small word) my perspective that had been closed off and wrong, finally my thoughts began to find ways to help my mind deal with future perceptions, I completed a Mindfulness course, which literally gave me a chance to breath and I completed a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy course, which taught me a lot, especially ways of curbing my overthinking....which work 90% of the time now, but when my brain does start to turn, I can use those methods, I met new people and simply was able to get back to finding me again.

I guess this whole blog entry is yet another reason why I want The Smile Coach to succeed, I've been up, I've been down, but sometimes all we need is a helping hand, I've been inspired by what feels like a life changing experience, or was that just my perception of it?

To be fair, it may not be someone else's, but that's why we should always be kind, you never know whats going on behind that smile.

It's also important to understand that you can only help someone when they are ready to change that perception, that mindset, when those small triggers are inviting them towards a brighter view, they may not know how to do it, but they want it, after all, as I've learnt that really is what friends are for, The Smile Coach may have been The Really Grumpy Coach without it!

Thank you for reading, please feel free to spread the smiles and share your positive thoughts on it!

Look after each other and keep smiling!

Lots of love

Emma,

The Smile Coach,

Located in Hastings, East Sussex

www.thesmilecoachforyou.co.uk

Facebook: Emma Wareham
Instagram: @thesmilecoachforyou
Twitter: @emmalovesarun